Birthday Coming Up

My Birthday is coming up this weekend and I would rather just forget it than celebrate it for a number of reasons:

• Its winter and its cold and no one wants to come to a party in winter.
• I'm dead broke
• 38 candles does not look good on a cake (more like a fekking towering inferno).
• I'm on diet to I can't have cake anyway.
• I've already received my gift from My Boerewors.
• Its Soccer World Cup and everyone will be watching the footie on telly.

Case closed.